Had a cozy Japanese meal at Tampines not too long back with a few gals cause 2 of them needed some emotional support. The restaurant is located somewhere near the Tampines Sports Hall for those who are interested.
Amidst some good finger food and comforting milkshakes, the conversation start to flow from the pleasantries of ” How is your work?” and “What did you get in your shopping trip yesterday?” to the deeper intricacies of their emotional wellbeing and their jaded view of men and dating.
As the title of this post plainly states, “Men and Women are different”. Of course, whenever I state this, people would tell me that they know that and it’s common sense. But I think a number of people out there have no idea what exactly that sentence means. Because, if they did understand that men and women are different then they would stop thinking about the man’s actions and words from a woman’s point of view and try to understand them from a man’s perspective. For example, a women is always thinking. We can’t help ourselves. Especially when we are in a relationship, we’ll think about the appropriate response to each action, how much he loves us, whether he is good for us or just out to have fun. We think about how we look to them or if we should bring them home to see the parents. And when we ask him what he is thinking, he says ” Nothing.” and we get upset. We get upset because we believe that he is hiding something or not trusting us enough to share his thoughts with us. But this is exactly what I mean by looking at a man from a woman’s viewpoint. Because to a man, sometimes, “Nothing” really mean nothing. Absolutely blank. Either that or they were admiring your cleavage and felt it would be offensive to say so. But basically he wasn’t into anything deep nor did he ever imagine how much repercussions his “nothing” might bring him.
I’m no expert with relationships but I do know the strategy of amassing knowledge and picking my battles. It’s pointless to waste your energy being upset with the smallest details and over thinking things. While your man might tolerate it or makeup for it, in the long run (especially if you intend to get married eventually and be with the same person for the next 50 years) , it’s unhealthy. I’m not saying that you should turn a blind eye to everything either ( not everyone can be like Jack Neo’s wife) but know where your limits are and pick fights on the issues that are most pertinent to your happiness. No one is perfect so a lasting relationship requires a lot of compromise and commitment from both parties. Men and women are so different that it is to your advantage that you understand the other party on his terms and look at matters logically instead of acting on instinct and impulsive emotions.
We went deeper into discussions of their love lives but I won’t be divulging any of that here nor will I be naming the parties involved at that emotional Japanese lunch.But I am happy to report that things seems to be looking better for the 2 gals.
On a happier note, I ended that day with dinner in the east with Sushi and Kenneth over great dishes and wine. Kenneth will be having his wedding in a couple of days and I’m really happy for him. I borrowed Sushi’s lovely ribbon hair clip that day, it’s so pretty!
And then even later in the night I had a little super belated birthday cake which gave a lovely end to the day. I was supposed to have had the little cake and celebration right after I came back from Taiwan but I fell sick and had to travel so it was always delayed. But eventually I had that cake and though it wasn’t anywhere near my birthday anymore, it was the inhabitant thought that is very much appreciated.